Saturday, April 19, 2008

Cold Breeze

"We did what we were trained to do, what we were bred to do, what we were born to do!"
- Dilios, "300"

I've spent the past few days in some deep contemplation. Thinking about what this thing is and how much more daunting it is has caused some interesting emotions. At first, I wasn't sure it could be done. "What am I thinking? There's no way I'm prepared."

Then I discovered what nervous feels like. I thought I knew nervous already from countless pre-race jitters or from going on dates or deciding that I was going to join the Marine Corps. I didn't know it. Nervous isn't a feeling in your stomach. Honest to God, it crept up behind me and sat on my soul. It sits there, very tiny, and when you feel at your strongest and most competent it quietly whispers, "eh, maybe." That's all.

The last emotion, the one I'm feeling now, is quiet, determined rage. I'm angry. I'm confident. I'm well trained. Imagine you're in a field somewhere in the mid-west. You're surrounded by golden, dusty wheat and there isn't anything else in sight for miles. Then a storm begins to move in. All you can see is huge, black clouds and a chilling breeze leading it. You know what that sight means. You know that in a few moments all hell is going to be cut loose. You are going to see something awesome.

Today is my last day of training. A thirty minute jog and a light weight lifting session. From today until 5 o'clock Friday the 25th I will be resting, sleeping and loading on carbs. Let me know if you feel a cold breeze around me.

Run hard.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

People should read this.